Staff Writer – Carol Cato
JR Miller: It is a high honour for a woman to be chosen from among all womankind to be the wife of a good and true man. She is lifted up to be a crowned queen. Her husband’s manly love laid at her feet exalts her to the throne of his life. Great power is placed in her hands. Sacred destinies are reposed in her keeping. Will she wear her crown beneficently? Will she fill her realm with beauty and with blessing? Or will she fail in her holy trust? Only her married life can be the answer.
My thoughts: Proverbs 14:1 “A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.” We must never lose sight of this and think that because we have the ring and the man, our work is done. Most men want a wife that welcomes him lovingly when he walks through the door, someone he can’t wait to get home to, after work.
He wants his home to be a place of sanctuary, a place where love grows. A foolish woman tears it down, a wise woman thinks twice before taking up an argument when her husband comes home or before bedtime. Eccles 3:1-7 says “there is a time and place for everything – A time to be silent and a time to speak”
JR Miller: A woman may well pause before she gives her hand in marriage, and inquire whether he is worthy to whom she is asked to surrender so much; whether he can bring true happiness to her life; whether he can meet the cravings of her nature for love and for companionship; whether he is worthy to be lifted to the highest place in her heart and honoured as a husband should be honoured.
She must ask these questions for her own sake, else the dream may fade with the bridal wreath, and she may learn, when too late, that he for whom she has left all and to whom she has given all is not worthy of the sacred trust, and has no power to fill her life with happiness, to wake her heart’s chords, to touch her soul’s depths.
My thoughts:I believe woman should read the above passage over and over again, not just before marriage, but before they embark on dating. How many women think about this when deciding to date a guy? How many of us only think about what a nice catch he is and how good he looks? (although it’s not only women who do this).
Dutiful wife. Photo coutesy azcentral.com
Looking back on my life as I read the passage above, I recall that I turned down marriage three times for these reasons. I’ve asked women, how they feel about submitting to the guy they’re dating? Nine out of ten, said “no way.” Why? Because like me, when I considered the proposal, my first thoughts were ‘could I truly love this man for the rest of my life?’ The answer was obviously ‘no’. At the time, I didn’t know about the concept of submission, now as a born again, I realise God was telling me something all those years ago.Even before dating a man, women should ask themselves ‘does this man have the same values?’, ‘will he have my back?’ Many women seem to love the idea of the fairy tale wedding but fail to really think long enough about the responsibility that goes with marriage. If men and woman took the time to think of these things there would be less divorce.
Are there needs in his soul, or hungers, which she cannot answer? Are there chords in his life which her fingers cannot wake? Surely it is proper for her to question her own soul while she asks him to question his soul for her. A wife has a part in the song of wedded love if it is to be a harmony.
She holds in her hands on her wedding day precious interests, sacred destinies, and holy responsibilities, which, if disclosed to her sight at once, might well appal the bravest heart. Her opportunity is one which the loftiest angel might covet. Not the happiness only of a manly life, but its whole future of character, of influence, of growth, rests with her. Continue next week – Wife part 2
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